Being self-centered can make it difficult to connect with others and build meaningful relationships. However, it is possible to work on becoming less self-centered and more empathetic toward others. Here are some tips on how to be less self-centered and improve your relationships with others.
What is a self-centered person?
A self-centered person tends to focus primarily on their own needs, wants, and desires rather than considering the needs of others. They often have difficulty empathizing with others and may be more concerned with their image and status than those around them. They may also be less likely to take responsibility for their actions and more likely to blame others for problems. Some common characteristics of self-centered people include being arrogant, lacking empathy, being self-absorbed, and having a strong sense of entitlement. However, it’s important to note that everyone can exhibit some self-centered behavior at some point in their life and not necessarily a persistent pattern of behavior.
8 Simple Steps to be less self-centered
- Practice active listening: When someone is speaking to you, give them your full attention and try to understand their perspective. Avoid interrupting or thinking about your response while they are still talking.
- Take responsibility for your actions: Recognize that your behavior may impact others and take responsibility for your actions. Apologize when necessary and make amends if you have hurt someone.
- Volunteer or help others: Helping others can be a great way to shift your focus away from yourself and become more aware of the needs of others.
- Practice empathy: Try to put yourself in other people’s shoes and understand their feelings and experiences. This can help you be more sensitive to their needs and less focused on your own.
- Reflect on your behavior: Take some time to reflect on your behavior and think about whether it is self-centered or not. Identify areas where you can improve and make a plan to change.
- Seek feedback: Ask friends and family for honest feedback about your behavior. This can be difficult to hear, but it can also provide valuable insight into how you come across to others.
- Practice gratitude: Be thankful for what you have and the people in your life rather than always focusing on what you want or think you deserve.
- Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness; this will help you to be more aware of the present moment and less caught up in your thoughts and feelings.
What causes a person to be self-centered?
Several factors can contribute to a person becoming self-centered. Some possible causes include:
- Narcissism: Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by excessive self-love and self-obsession. People with this disorder often have a grandiose sense of self-importance and a lack of empathy for others.
- Childhood experiences: Some research suggests that childhood experiences, such as being raised by narcissistic parents or experiencing trauma, can contribute to self-centered behavior.
- Low self-esteem: Paradoxically, some people with low self-esteem may develop self-centered tendencies as a way of overcompensating for their inadequacy.
- Societal pressure: Society often places a high value on self-promotion and success, which can encourage people to prioritize their interests and goals above those of others.
- Lack of socialization: A lack of socialization and poor communication skills can make it difficult for a person to understand and empathize with others, leading to self-centered behavior.
- Social media: The rise of social media has led to increased self-promotion and self-obsession, which can contribute to self-centered behavior.
Can a self-centered person change?
It is possible for a self-centered person to change, but it may take time and effort. Changing deeply ingrained behavior patterns is not easy and requires a willingness to reflect on one’s behavior and make a conscious effort to change.
What is the difference between selfish and self-centered?
Selfish refers to being primarily concerned with one’s interests, whereas self-centeredness refers to being excessively focused on oneself and one’s own needs or desires. A selfish person may prioritize their own needs, but a self-centered person may ignore or disregard the needs of others.
Signs of a self-centered person
Here are some signs that someone may be self-centered:
- They frequently talk about themselves and their accomplishments.
- They have difficulty listening to others and tend to interrupt or steer conversations back to themselves.
- They may have a sense of entitlement and believe that they deserve special treatment or privileges.
- They may be dismissive of other people’s opinions or ideas.
- They may be arrogant or boastful.
- They may be unaware of or ignore social cues or boundaries.
- They may be unresponsive to feedback or criticism.
It’s worth noting that everyone has moments of self-centeredness, and it’s not always a problem. However, when it becomes a consistent pattern of behavior, it can be detrimental to relationships and interactions with others.
What are examples of self-centeredness?
Here are a few examples of self-centered behavior:
- A person who is always talking about their accomplishments and experiences and doesn’t show interest in hearing about others.
- A person who insists on always making decisions and doesn’t consider other people’s opinions or feelings.
- A person who expects special treatment gets upset when they don’t receive it.
- A person always tries to one-up others in conversation or make others feel inferior.
- A person who is always late or does not show up for agreed-upon plans because their time is more important than others.
- A person who is not willing to compromise or collaborate with others