Did you recently break up with the person you were planning to live your whole life? Do you often ask yourself that is it my fault my relationship failed? Blaming yourself for a failed relationship not only affects your mental health and confidence but it also reduces your chances of having a better relationship in the future.
Every couple or relationship has a unique story but all have the same endings. Either things work out between them and they fulfill the promise of spending their whole life together or just end up breaking up after a few months or years as their love starts fading away. Blaming yourself after a breakup takes the chance of healing from a broken relationship away from you.
4 Ways to Stop Blaming Yourself for a Failed Relationship
Support, understanding, respect, and trust are some basic elements that make up a relationship. If one partner or both fails to provide any of the above-mentioned elements the spark in the relationship they had initially started fading away.
If you think you are the one who should be blamed for your failed relationship then stop it before you lose the other chances nature is providing you. Here are the best 4 ways you can use to stop blaming yourself for a failed relationship.
1. A relationship is a Two Way Street
In any relationship that fails, mistakes happen from both sides. The two strongest pillars of a home are the partners who worked TOGETHER and changed their house into a home. Just like you cannot ride a bicycle with one tire, a relationship cannot work with only one partner putting all effort. Both have to contribute their part.
If you think that you made mistakes then you did many positive things as well. If you think that your ex-partner is blameless then it is not the case as both partners are involved in a failed relationship somehow. If you are giving credit to your partner then give credit to yourself as well.
This is how your relationship was. Grieving over losing someone you loved may make you put the whole blame on yourself but remember that you did what you could do as a partner.
2. You did What You Could Do
We are not born as relationship experts. We learn how to keep relationships with time and age. The things you did for your relationship were the only things you knew at that time. If you had better or more ideas you would have applied them to save your relationship.
If you knew how to listen to your ex more patiently, how to understand the mutual differences patiently, or how to trust each other then you would have done that as well. We, humans, keep growing and developing mentally, spiritually, and bodily as we age. Who you were in your past relationship does not define who you will be in your future relationship.
3. Accept Yourself
Every human being is a bundle of negative as well as positive qualities. No human is perfect in this universe. Accept that you are not a god but a mere human being who can make blunders as well. Accept your flaws as much as you accept the flaws of your ex.
What you should not accept is to keep regretting over what you did and not learn anything out of it.
4. Learn from Your Failed Relationship and Move on
Both partners are somehow involved in breaking up a relationship. But if you think that you did more wrong than your ex or you had more flaws in this relationship then accept your mistakes, learn from them, and bring a positive change in yourself.
Instead of regretting what has happened and cannot be changed, think about what you can do and change to have a better future. Every human being makes mistakes in his/her life. The best approach to get success even from your mistakes is to accept them, take lessons from them, apply them, and move on.
Ask yourself what is it that you need to work on then take your time to replace your bad habit with the good one. Once you do that, you will get plenty of chances to have a successful relationship in life.
Is It My Fault My Relationship Failed?
Every relationship works well only if both partners put an effort. Similarly, any relationship that fails involves mistakes done by both partners. No one should be given the whole blame for a failed relationship. So, no, it is neither your fault completely nor your ex-partner’s, so stop asking ‘is it my fault my relationship failed?’
Now that you don’t have your ex in your life anymore, look for other opportunities that nature has provided you. If nature closes a door it opens many at the same time. We fail to see those opened doors if you keep looking at the closed one. You and your ex were not meant to be together forever. Work on yourself, you will soon find someone who fits the best with you.