Relationship

Being Jealous of Your Girlfriend’s Past

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Relationships are not always so easy, especially when you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past. You are torn about it, although it makes you happy to know that now she is beside you, she is happy and satisfied, she has got rid of her past but at the same time, you feel jealous of it all. 

Why am I obsessed with my girlfriend’s past?

You may have asked yourself ‘why am I so bothered about my girlfriend’s past? Why do my girlfriend’s past relationships bother me? You indeed get jealous at times, maybe when her ex-boyfriend’s name comes up, or when you discover something about her past that you were not familiar with, or when she talks about some of her best days when she was happiest with her friends, her ex-boyfriend.

It may be because you are so possessive about your relationship with her, you may feel inadequate because of her past, you may have low self-esteem, low self-confidence and that is why you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past. You may not think of someone who was once at your place. It all bothers you to the core but the reality is that being jealous of your girlfriend’s past is a toxic thing and you should get rid of this to have a healthy and happy bond with her. 

Should I judge my girlfriend on her past?

Judging people based on their past is not a sane act and when it comes to your girlfriend it should be the last thing you should think of doing. Ask yourself, “Does my girlfriend’s past matter in our relationship? Should I be mad about my girlfriend’s past? You’ll get the answer.

don't judge

 We all evolve, we all learn from our mistakes, no one is perfect, we can be with wrong people, or a bad company but that does not mean that we belong there or we are labeled there so how can you even think of judging your girlfriend because of her past mistakes? You know it’s not right, you know you can’t afford to lose her, you know how beautiful her heart is and how lucky you are to be with her. So you should try to control your toxic thoughts, your disturbing views about her past.

8 tips to Overcome Your Girlfriend’s Past 

We are here to help you out with this so here are 8 amazing tips that can help you to get over your past if you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past.

Identify What bothers you

The first thing you need to do is to think about what bothers you about her past? What are the things that make you feel jealous about her past?

You need to identify if it’s a person that makes you feel insecure or the mistakes that she made or her sexual life with her partner. Before you think of why you can’t stop thinking about your girlfriend’s past it is important to identify what makes you bothered. What exactly are those things? 

Remind yourself that her past shaped her into what she is today. 

You must feel that your girlfriend is the most amazing person today, she is beautiful by her nature, her manners, her heart. She is truly a gem but how can you forget that the person she is today is because of her experiences, the people she has met, the mistakes she has made, the lessons she has learned, All this has made her the beautiful soul that she is today. 

fear of conflict in a relationship

Learn to accept your girlfriend’s past, you can never remove her past because that’s what has shaped her into this genuine and pure person she is today. She is amazing, she is great because of what she has gone through, because of her past so being jealous of your girlfriend’s past is a toxic thing to do.  

Plan the Future 

For how long do you want to waste your time thinking about her past? Don’t you appreciate enough that now that she is with you nothing else matters, nothing else is important?

So instead of nagging about her past, about your future together with her. Plan a beautiful life with her, accomplish things that you have always imagined with her, enjoy with her, make a life with her. Because she deserves to be happy, you deserve to be at peace therefore leave the past and plan the future. 

Be aware of double standards 

Don’t forget that you have a past as well, you have made mistakes as well, you may have been in a lot of silly relationships, you may also have a history of ex-girlfriends. So before you judge her, look into your past as well. It’s shameful to think that men can have a colorful past, it’s okay for them to have ex affairs but for women, it’s not okay. So beware of these double standards and if you love your girl, don’t get into all this avoid being jealous of your girlfriend’s past  

Change yourself not her  

Remember that it’s your problem, not hers. It’s something that you should feel sorry about, it’s something that you should be apologetic about. She has nothing to do with your toxic thoughts. You have to realize that her past is the life that has led her to come along your way, to be with you so instead of being jealous of your girlfriend’s past, love her enough to accept her fully and change yourself, not anything about her life. 

Respected feel by each other

Work of Yourself 

If you are insecure about her past it can be because you are not confident enough in yourself. You may think that you don’t deserve her love or you feel that you are not equal to the guys from her past so you need to do a lot of work on yourself, on your self-confidence, your self-esteem. It’s more about you than her. Therefore become the best version of yourself and overcome all these insecurities. 

Talk to some trustworthy person

If you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past, If you are engulfed with so many questions, a lot of confusion, jealousy you may not be able to handle it on your own therefore a close friend, or anyone you trust can be the best person you can share your problems with. That person can give you reasonable and good advice. If you feel like you don’t have anyone to share your issues with, to whom you can trust fully then you can always consult a therapist. 

Talk to her

Last but not least if you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past, talk to her, but be very careful of everything you say, try to avoid anything that can hurt her. Don’t make her feel that your feelings are her mistake and she needs to be apologetic about this. Tell her that you want to overcome these feelings, you are working on it, clear all the confusions, clear all the doubts. 

FAQS

Is it normal to be jealous of your girlfriend’s past?

Yes, we are humans and we can have the feeling of jealousy so it is completely normal to be jealous of your girlfriend’s past but it’s not right, it’s something that can ruin your relationship with her so try to get rid of this jealousy and negativity. 

What would you do if your girlfriend lied about her past?

If your girlfriend lied about her past then instead of being aggressive and mad at her try to talk to her, try to clear things up, listen to her reasons, by doing so you will do great as her partner and as someone who loves her. 

How to accept and forgive your girlfriend for her past?

You can follow tips to wholeheartedly accept and forgive your girlfriend for her past. 

Do I need to get rid of this jealousy? 

If you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past then yes you need to get rid of this jealousy and the sooner you realize this the better it would be. 

Why do I care about my girlfriend’s past?

You may be insecure about your self-confidence, your self-esteem or you may be just extremely possessive. That’s why you care about your girlfriend’s past.

Final Words

We all deserve peace, happiness and comfort with people that are close to us. So if you are being jealous of your girlfriend’s past then try to get rid of it. We hope that the tips we have mentioned above can be of great help. Love your girl, spend quality time with her and accept the way she is, if she’s by your side then nothing else should matter.

Stay Happy, Stay at ease! 

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